2013 Lights Out

Time for the annual thingamadoodle about my year. I suppose I could sum up by saying IT SUCKED HAIRY DINGO DINGUS and be done with it, but why break with tradition? Let’s do this.

1. What did you do in 2013 that you’d never done before?
Wow, this questionnaire is going to be awkward, isn’t it?

2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
Last New Year’s seems like 2.3 million years ago. I seldom make resolutions though, so I am going to say nope and nope on this one.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No one here in Seattle, but some friends far away did, so I have yet to meet any of these new people. Yay babies!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
Hmmm, let’s see. Let me think. I know there was something. Oh yeah, I know I have BARELY MENTIONED IT, but yes.

5. What trips did you take?
A weekend in Portland, several trips to Michigan, and quick weekends to San Francisco, Chicago, and a Washington beach house. I wanted to go to New York so badly that it hurt my innards but it was not in the cards (or the pocketbook) this year.

6. What would you like to have in 2014 that you lacked in 2013?
OMG, questionnaire. I am trying to not get too heavy with these answers and you are not making it easy, so I guess I should just give up. But I will hold out a little longer with lighter answers and just say…a trip to New York.

7. What date from 2013 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Ok FINE. You’re making me go there. May 11, when I lost my sweet dad.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
My biggest achievement was the fact that I fully engaged with everything that was happening with me all year. I engaged in my own sadness, I reached out to people, I kept myself going, I was still a friend to others, I was still a good coworker. I could have shut down, but I didn’t. I let people take care of me, and when they couldn’t I took care of myself.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I can’t think of anything, although I am sure there’s something.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Not of the physical kind, thank goodness.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
We redid our bathroom sink, cabinets, and tile which cost us some scratch, but now we brush our teeth in high style, like a Kardashian or something. Although they probably do not brush their own teeth.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Every last person who hung out with me, sent me good wishes, said something kind, made me laugh, got me out of the house, called me on the phone, sent me flowers, commented on the blog, all of it. In many ways it has felt like I have had more lonely days than in other years, but when I think about all the good stuff lumped together? Damn, there’s good stuff there.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Yeah, there was icky stuff too, but dwelling on it isn’t going to help anything. So: pass.

14. Where did most of your money go?
For once, the answer is NOT our house! This year, it was plane tickets. Last minute plane tickets will eat your money fast. Not complaining, of course.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Nordic Boy busted me out of work one weekend and we went to Portland and just had a freaking blast.

16. What song will always remind you of 2013?
Graceless, by the National.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Sadder.
ii. thinner or fatter? Same.
iii. richer or poorer? Poorer. Dang, question #17 is a bastard.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
I really feel like this year I did just what I should.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Same answer as #18.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
We are invited to a game night at a friend’s, but I have a feeling I will be wrapped up in my house with my dude.

22. Did you fall in love in 2013?
So much more.

23. How many one-night stands?
Can we just get rid of question #23 at this point?

24. What was your favorite TV program?
I finally got on The Good Wife bandwagon (late to the party), but damn that show is good. I also really liked Top of the Lake.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

26. What was the best book you read?
How to Get Filthy Rich in Rising Asia, by Mohsin Hamid would have been my favorite even if my year hadn’t looked like it did, but put my year on top of it, and that really locks it in.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Daughter was a band that was sort of a core shaker for me.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

I cannot think of one that I can really say was a favorite, for the life of me. How about I just say something that is non-film but still entertainment? I adore the Judge John Hodgman podcast. It is the best.

29. What did you do on your birthday?
I went out to dinner with a small group of pals.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
I have some friends who live far away that really made themselves available all year by phone, email, cards, and visits. I wish I could see those folks more often.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2013?
Same as always: I love dressing up.

32. What kept you sane?
Nordic Boy.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Kalinda on The Good Wife rocks my socks.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
I was the least up on current issues than I have ever been in my adult life this year. So “stirred”? Relatively speaking, I was not stirred. (Or shaken).

35. Who did you miss?
My dad.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
Biogirl has a new dude, and he is making her really happy, which is a sweet thing to see.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2013:
People are who they are, and love is accepting that and being kind. My dad was good at that one, and I am getting better.

38. A song lyric that sums up your year.
The thing that got me through the year is the the thing that gets me through any year: love. I have spent a lot of time thinking about the love my dad had for me, the love that my parents had for each other, and the love that Nordic Boy gives me every single day. That’s why this song makes me feel teary. It’s love and life and death, all in one. It’s joy. It makes me want to squeeze that dude of mine now, right now.

Life is short, goes the cliche. But it really is, you guys. We have each other for so fleeting a time. We are all going down, so let’s spend the time left on love.

Your love is bright as ever/Even in the shadows
Baby kiss me/Before they turn the lights out
Your heart is glowing/And I’m crashing into you
Baby kiss me/Before they turn the lights out

In the darkest night hour/I’ll search through the crowd
Your face is all that I see/I’ll give you everything
Baby love me lights out

We don’t have forever/Baby daylight’s wasting
You better kiss me/Before our time is run out

Nobody sees what we see/They’re just hopelessly gazing
Baby take me/Before they turn the lights out
Before time is run out/Baby love me lights out

I love it like XO
You love me like XO
You kill me boy XO
You love me like XO
All that I see
Give me everything
Baby love me lights out


  1. How to say without sounding soppy that you have been in my thoughts. Similar circumstances here as we wait for the worst to happen have had me welling up at your most recent blogs. Touching, thoughtful, honest. You had me at the opener several times! Sending you warm wishes from many miles away and hope for a better 2014. Enough of the soppy! Daughter? A most excellent choice x

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