I would just like to start off by pointing out that not once this whole season have I complained about the weather, being cold, rain, gray skies, lack of sunshine, nothing. And to tell you the truth, there were few days that I even wanted to. Our little pop culture librarian. She’s finally growing up.
Today the weather made me a little cranky though. My inner brat shall not be squelched completely.
To counterbalance this lack of annoying weather-whining, I know I have been a leetle whiney about work lo these past few months. There have been times that I have thought about work so much that it put me off wanting to post anything here, because I just could not See Past It to write about anything else. That sentence I just wrote there makes me want to pukey up a cukey. Honestly, lady. Get a grip.
This got me thinking the question that is so tedious: why do I blog again?
For about 98% of the time I have been writing this blog (look kids! math!), I have had the attitude that I was writing about something that made me happy (yes, I am one of those people that writes and then guffaws at my own self, like Bob Hope or Harvey Korman or Jimmy Fallon) and then throwing it out into the world like a message in a bottle (so un-green, throwing shit in the water like that), and if people happen to see it, wow, that’s pretty cool. I am old enough to still marvel at the power of the Interwebs in this way. I have never marketed the bloggy, or told my friends about it (some of them know by now, but not because I was obnoxious hey-Read-My-Blog-Girl), or anything like that. Most of my blog friends are people who I have commented on their blog, so then they come over and comment on mine, all neighborly. I know there are other people out there, but I don’t know how you found me, or what makes you stay, if you do. After a couple of years, when I started to get curious about this question, I installed a sitemeter, which was fun for a while (look! someone stopped by for 3 minutes one time from Tanzania and then never returned!), but then I got rid of it because I kind of liked not knowing how many people were out there. And I started to get all philisophical about whether It Mattered that there were three people reading, or three hundred, and I wanted to be all “it makes no difference, yo, I am nonchalant,” because I like to try to impress myself sometimes.
So most of the time, I just write, and post, and I really have a pretty hazy idea if anyone is reading beyond like, ten people. And if anyone ever comments to say howdy, I really do feel delighted, each and every time. And if anyone ever says anything to me in person about the blog, well then that just blows my mind and bugs me out. It really does. I don’t tend to get a lot of comments, and it’s not like people are knocking down my door to tell me that they read this stuff, so each time it happens I am still agog. The internet: it is magic. Oftentimes it can be porny magic, but it has other magics too. Really it does.
Yesterday, I got an email from a blog friend, telling me that she basically met a new BFF because they both read my blog. Like, dudes. Friend love was found in the comments section of this little space. Birdies, rainbows, hearts, kitties! You know how, in Sleepless in Seattle, Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan meet because they both are listening to that horrible Dr. Marcia Fieldstone? Hey, I was totally that horrible Dr. Marcia Fieldstone! Sort of! So yay me! That is way better than getting a lot of hits on a sitemeter. If only there was a meter that counted happy shit like this, I would totes sign up for that.
I have been feeling a little yawny about blogland lately. My blogland in particular. I think I was on my way to asking that tedious question of myself again. But now, I won’t. I blog because I just like to. Simple as that. And if nice people meet each other in my blog comments and want to leave their Seattle houseboat and boring Bill Pullman in Baltimore (it is sort of scary how much I remember about that movie) and meet on the top of the Empire State Building, and I could be Dr. Marcia for them, then hells yes. Total bonus.