Only funny to me, but it’s my blog

Ok, so I am going to talk about the imaginary town thing again. Last time for a while, I promise.

I am warning you that if you know a little bit about dance, this post may be slightly funny to you. If you know a lot about dance, it might be more so. If you know nothing about dance, please feel free to stop reading now.

I have a close friend who is a ballroom dancer. Like, he does the competitions and everything. He has never had any training in anything that I have had training in, and vice versa. A lot of the time that we get together, we talk for hours about dance- his styles and my styles, the similarities and the differences, the theory and the practice. I am quite sure you would fall over dead with boredom if you were around us when we do this.

That is, unless we get really inspired by our conversation and push away all the furniture in the room and start actually comparing styles instead of just talking about them. This happens oh, about once a month these days, and I am sure it would be quite entertaining to see. Me, knowing nothing about no salsa or cha cha or shit like that, trying to hammerlock outside turn (hello, crashing and burning). And him, knowing nothing about ballet and modern, trying to cabriole or figure out a mixed meter phrase. Nordic Boy has been known to pull up a chair when this gets going and guffaw his heart’s delight at us.

A few months ago, I was going over some ballet basics with my friend. One of the steps is called a developpe. If you have never done one before, it can be sort of painful. As my friend tried this, this is what he said.

Him: Wow. This hurts.
Me: Remember to keep your hips square.
Him: Ouch.
Me: Don’t wobble your standing leg.
Him: OW.
Me: Yeah.
Him: (breathing hard) You know what? I hate Dave LaPay. Dave LaPay is a total bastard!

DAVE LAPAY. This almost busted my gut with the funny. Because that is indeed how you pronounce developpe. (Some Americans say “Dave L. O’Pay” so that would work too). I have known Dave LaPay since I was 4 years old! How did I never realize he was a character for our town?

Weeks later, my friend said that he wanted me to take him to a super traditional classical ballet performance. I took him to see Swan Lake. Later, we discussed the show, and he had a question for me.

Him: That jester character in the royal court. There was a move that he was doing that was pretty cool. What is that called?
Me: What move? Can you recreate it, even a little?
Him: Kind of like this…(mangled up ballet step)
Me: Oh, that’s a temps de cuisse.
Him: That move was interesting to me. I really like Tom.
Me: Tom?
Him: Tom DeQuees. He’s much nicer than Dave LaPay.

TOM DEQUEES!!!

You have no idea how much this has made my month.

Based on the discovery of Dave and Tom, we also discovered a sassy young lady named Rhonda Zsamb, based on, of course, the ront de jambe.

Dave is the effer of the group, Tom is happy-go-lucky, and Rhonda is a sultry tamale. Again, this may only be funny to you if you know what these moves are. And really, maybe not even then. But to me, they are comedy gold.

These are the types of things that keep me going in life.

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8 comments

  1. I thought Rhonda and Ron could have all sorts of wacky misunderstandings. And there's always the Anns: Ann DeDanz and Ann DeOrs. It's nice to have dance people to talk to. I remember complaining about the epaulement and arms of the dancers in a campus performance, and non of my companions knew what I meant. Yes, I did some efface and croise positions in the middle of a crowded bar.

  2. PLEASE tell me that Dave has a dog or a cat named Fawn, so it can beFawn du Dave LaPayI used to have nightmares about being forced to fondu for hours. I think that was in the reign of the Mean French Lady teacher.

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