Oh my friends. My dream has come true.

We got a robot vacuum cleaner.

We spent much of Sunday evening watching it work, as if it was a very riveting episode of Double Trouble, starring the Segal twins. It was magnificent in much the same way. I think I have become one of those scary people that want a robot labor force to do everything for me from here on out. If it can vacuum my floor, why can’t it fold my laundry and make my bed and apply my mascara too? Oh Roomba, you are the gateway robot.

Oh and other stuff happened this weekend too. Like for one thing, we went and saw my friends play at the Fremont Fair. Play in a band, I guess I should clarify. Otherwise you might think they were engaged in a pinochle tourney or something. I really wish that word was spelled “peeknuckle.” I would think better of the game if it were spelled that way. The way it’s really spelled makes me think I should say “pin-notch-lay.” Doesn’t it look like that? Back when I was in middle school and I discovered the glory that is Dave Gahan’s voice, I went through a period where I called the band Depeche Mode “Dah-Peachy Mode.” Dah-Peachy. And I’m sorry but I still like that name better than the real name.

What was I saying? Oh yes, my weekend.

So we went to see my friends’ rock it. The set sounded really good, and was enhanced by a dude in a bear plushy outfit dancing in front of the stage, which is always a nice touch. I missed this year’s annual naked bike riding parade at the fair, which to be honest, was kind of ok with me.

Also, Nordic Boy finished his water re-routing drainage yard project. There was drilling, and man-sized hole digging, and pipe installation, and mixing and setting of cement. All things of which I know little to nothing. But it was exciting nonetheless and I am told water will now drain as it should, goddamit.

We also attended two friends’ joint 30th birthday party, which started out at a local pizza joint. There was pizza leftover, and then we all wanted to trek over to a bar across the neighborhood, and so Rambo valiantly offered to carry the leftover pizza to the second location. So we walked for many blocks, and he looked like this the entire time, which cracked me up for some reason. I’m not sure why.

Carrying pizza Big-Boy style late at night for blocks and blocks is somehow funny to me.

I also caught up with my friend D, who probably shouldn’t be hanging out with me because there is much laughing and he still has tender stitches from his appendix outage last week. So when he laughs really hard, he holds his hand over his sore appendix hole. And I say “ha ha! I’ve got you in STITCHES!” each time. Which we both think is funny, which is one of the reasons we’re friends.

I think I’m going to watch my robot do my floors now.


  1. I'm so jealous! I've wanted to get a Roomba for years!I've always had dreams that the Roomba and the dog would become friends and I'd get home after work and find them snuggling together. Sigh.

  2. Can we have a picture of the Robot hoover? I have no idea what one looks like but am super intrigued by the idea. Do you just press a button and it shoots off hoovering up any dust it can find? So so cool.

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