First of all, the other day, I was sitting out in public, minding my own business, and this random dude says to me…
Him: What’s your name?
Me: (I tell him my first name).
Him: What is that…Indian?
Me: Well, it’s Hindi, yes.
Him: I was given the Indian name Suresh.
Me: HA HA HA HA HA HA.
Him: Oh. I guess that means that you don’t care.
Isn’t that a weird conversation? I am not one to just bust out laughing in people’s faces when they are talking to me. Ok maybe I am a little. But especially when it’s something like THAT. His Indian name? This ain’t no Dances with Wolves, Mister. My kind of Indian? We don’t bestow names on people like that. Can you imagine? “Ah, yes Nordic Boy. You have brought my household honor. Henceforth, I shall knight you…Deepak.” hahahahahaha. (That, by the way, might only be a joke that’s funny if you’re Indian. So hi, four Indian readers, that one was for you.) It just don’t work that way with us. You have to be born in to get one of our names. Ooh la la, we are so keeping the names behind the velvet rope. And then? The response to the laughing? “I guess that means you don’t care.” What a funny thing to say. It made me laugh more.
He probably thought I was touched in the head. Which, let’s face it.
Second of all, I have been staying up way too late this week, watching tivo’d speeches from the Democratic Convention. What a nerd. A sleepy, sleepy nerd.
Third of all, last weekend I realized that the sunny, warm, perfect Seattle summer days, they are numbered. It is dead summer walking. So BioGirl and I, we decided to get out there and enjoy it goddammit.
We got on a ferry boat and rode a half hour across the Sound to get to an island, just to go somewhere different for lunch. The island we went to was Bainbridge. It’s very difficult for me to go to Bainbridge Island without singing the Ben Bridge jingle, by the way. Instead of the “diamond people” I sing the “island people.” I is so clever I should have my own reality show, shouldn’t I? I could never live on Bainbridge or else I would be singing that jingle all the livelong day. On the way there, we had a serious discussion about how, if you were a doctor like McDreamy, you could really live across the Sound and be expected to get to work if there was a dire emergency. Like you are really going to be hopping the ferry boat back and forth when people need their skullmeats worked on, right? There are lots of islands in the Puget Sound, and Bainbridge is the most accessible by ferry, so we figured of all the places McDreamy supposedly lives, it’s got to be Bainbridge. We decided he must have an apartment in town too or something, because it’s just not practical. Let’s just put aside the fact that he is a fictional character and that we are mainly really annoyed by that show in general for many reasons, too numerous to go into here, and we just may have a point, don’t you think?
Anyway. As we wrestled with these great questions of our times, we wandered through the ferry…
and then out on the deck, where we discovered that we were in a ferry Nascar (Nasferry?) race with another boat right next to us…
Walked around, and spent a little money on our respective favorite things (BioGirl got an ice cream cone, and I bought a dress from Sweet Deal).
And on the way home, we sat in the ferry, and looked out through the window to the deck at the people…
and made up imaginary conversations that these people might have been having with each other. It was like a silent film where we provided the dialogue. A very snarky silent film.
Her: If only we could get paid for this.
Her: Like, I wish it could be our job to sit behind a glass and watch people, and like, make up dialogue for them.
Her: We’re so good at it. We’re funny.
Me: Would it have to be us sitting behind glass?
Her: Well, yeah.
Me: That’s the part that I’m not sure about.
Her: I love that THAT’S the part of the plan that you’re not sure about.