I am here today to proclaim something. Ready? This I do proclaimeth to thee:
I will not talk about the rainy weather for the REST OF THE SUMMER.
Because man. Us Seattle people? We can talk about the rainy weather. Especially in June. Constantly. It’s like how LA people always talk about traffic and New York people always talk about how New York is better than everywhere else, and how Chicago people talk about where they had their last John Cusack sighting. We have to talk about rain in June! Like we have never seen rain in June before!
The thing is, it rains in June every year. Summer doesn’t really start here until late June or early July. And even then it is a mild summer with rainy days thrown in. But yet, every year, we all whip ourselves into a frenzy because OH MY GOD IT IS RAINING IN JUNE. It is June Rain Amnesia. And I am guilty of it and so I shall not mention it on this here blog for the rest of the summer. Deal?
In other news, yesterday I was so tired I felt like I had a hangover. And this time, it wasn’t because of insomnia. It was because of Michael J. Fox.
Nordic Boy was out of town and so I had the house to myself on Monday night. And so I did what any former Women’s Studies major would do on such an evening alone. I watched the Bachelorette on tv. And it was a two hour episode. The shame! The dirty, disgusting shame. Why do I watch things that are guaranteed to annoy the everloving jeebus out of me? WHY? I think it is maybe because I want someone to talk to, and there is nothing that will get me talking like an episode of the Bachelorette. It is prime talking-back-to-the-tv fodder.
Anyhoo. After that I should have just thrown in the towel and went to bed. But I didn’t. Instead, I perused my Tivo Suggestions. And you know what was on there? Teen Wolf, starring Alex P. Keaton and Frances from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure! What could I do? It was right there! I had to say YES PLEASE. And I sat there and watched the whole thing. And stayed up way too late. And felt like a zombie for the rest of the next day.
This whole responsible adult thing is such a charade.
Last night, I could have had a repeat performance of the Tivo Suggestions Monster, but I was saved by Hopscotch, who came over and graciously indulged me with actual human conversation. This was lucky, as I had a fresh recording of “Some Like It Hot” simmering in the Tivo box and I could have so easily gone there.
See, when there are other people present, they can lure me away from the Tivo Suggestion Monster. Like last weekend?
Me: (turning on the Tivo) Oh my god.
Nordic Boy: What?
Me: (overcome with excitement) LOOK what is on the Tivo!
NB: The Ghost and Mr. Chicken?
Me: SWEET. Let’s watch it!
NB: I’m sorry. I can’t.
Me: What, are you busy?
NB: No. I just…can’t.
Me: But it’s DON KNOTTS! Mr. Furley! Bugging out for two hours straight!
NB: Exactly. I can’t do that.
Me: Oh. Really?
NB: Really. I just can’t do it.
Me: Aw, fine.
My friends and Nordic Boy help me with these boundaries. It’s good, because otherwise, I may never sleep again.