Lately, I have been thinking about what my perfect karaoke song would be. Why am I doing this? Am I going to be karaoke-ing any time soon? No. But I was at a karaoke establishment a few weeks ago, and the indecisiveness of my party (I am including myself here) on what we all wanted to sing was PITIFUL. Pitiful, I tell you. For some, the indecisiveness may have been a red herring. I suspect it may have been a way for some to deflect their fair karaoke turn. Hmmm, I can’t be next to get up there and make an ass of myself. I haven’t decided on a song. A likely story.
But not me. My indecision was real. I couldn’t decide! And ever since then, I have been ruminating on what the perfect choice, for me, would be. It came to me over the weekend, and I was SO EXCITED. Again, why was I excited? I am not planning on going back to karaoke land any time soon. But still. I have to get my jollies somehow, people.
I couldn’t wait to tell someone. And in my house, the only other someone is Nordic Boy. Nordic Boy is not a karaoke-er. He is a reserved sort of fellow when it comes to public embarrassment, and to think of him willingly getting up in front of strangers to belt out a tune, or to do anything really, is laughable. It just would. not. happen. He is not a performer. But still, I wanted to tell him of the joy of my choice.
Instead of just blurting it out, I couched it in the guise of wanting to hear something that he had to say. I started it out with posing a question to him. You know you’ve done this. Asked someone a question not to actually hear what they have to say, but just so’s you can tell them what YOU have to say after they’re done jibber jabbering. This is what I was doing. I admit it.
Me: So, let’s say you were to karaoke.
Him: I wouldn’t.
Me: I know. But let’s say you were. Like, if it was just us and our friends. Not in front of strangers.
Me: What song would you pick?
Him: Probably a Journey song.
Him: Yeah, like “Separate Ways” or “Any Way You Want It.”
Me: But… but…
See, you guys, THAT WAS MY PICK. Not only was my pick a Journey song, but it was THOSE TWO SONGS. IN THAT ORDER OF PREFERENCE. It was like he read my mind. It’s not like we are playing Journey songs at our house. We haven’t even heard a Journey song in years. HOW could he have picked it out of thin air like that? My songs? MY SONGS?
Me: YOU STOLE MY SONGS.
Me: Those were my songs! MINE!
Him: Really? Huh. That’s weird.
Me: YOU CAN’T HAVE THEM!
Him: It’s not like I’m really going to sing karaoke, you know. You can have the songs.
Me: Well… I don’t know if I want them now.
Him: You’re a strange, strange girl.
Me: You’re a song stealer.
Him: Maybe we should touch and go our separate ways.